It's been rough, to say the least. Everyday I think I'm getting better, I end up feeling like crud again. I'm starting to wonder if this is all in my head or not. I'm just tired..all the time. Even if I get a decent or even perfect amount of sleep...I can't get out of bed. It takes everything I can just to get up. I have to though; I need to drag myself up. Teeka and the other animals need food and attention, she needs to be walked, cared for, loved. It's just getting rough. I thought I was getting better but lately I seem to be back at square one. I get to the end of the road and I'm already hacking up a coughing storm like there's no tomorrow. I take Teeka out to run, and I can't run after her. I can't play with her. Kevin does most of the playing with her when we take her out for her runs...because I can't seem to do it. He tries to get me to run around with them, and I can't. I can't even seem to get that initial take off to break into a sprint.
My cough is back, or maybe it never went away. I'm positive it was getting better. I've called clinic and keep getting the same answer..."it's the air. Allergies. Pollen." ..right..but I've never had issues with any of these before. And I don't have allergies..The worst I ever really had an issue with was fog.
Hell, my last appointment when they took me off the IV...they didn't even give me a chest x-ray. I had a PFT which no one even looked at or seemed to care about (I know this because I had to run around like mad just to give them the results. When I gave them the envelope explaining that the results where in it they just looked at me like I had three heads. They took it and went on there way). When I saw the doctor..he wasn't even aware I had a PFT done that day, nor did he make any effort to go get the results which they now had. Asked how I was feeling...I explained I seemed to be getting better but I still wasn't 100%, I could tell. But my lungs sounded clear (which..they always do. This is nothing new). And they told me I could come back in 6 months....which I then had to ask what was being done about my IV, finally they said it can come out -__-
Ranting aside, it's just me wondering if I really got over the pneumonia...or if it's still lurking there. Clinic doesn't seem to be in any rush to see me, and I'm just frustrated...and tired.
I'm not going to just roll over and give up. I can't. No way in hell. But I need to know. I want re-assurance.
It's just frustrating.
Well I'm off to nom some stew, and wait til this little shower lets up to take Teeka out.
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